Coronavirus…a Snapshot of the Future

“For in one hour so great riches are come to nothing.”  Revelation 18:17

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It was bound to happen. Everybody knew it would. When, or how, nobody knew. Such is the way with plagues. Cry safety, and the world collapses. Chaos rules.

Chaos has no rules but one: crap happens. Since rolls of toilet paper are selling for $50, dumpsters on the island are being raided, kiosks are set up in parking lots. Squares of discarded newspapers sell for $5. The lines are long.

People are housebound, in shock from the financial market melt-down of $5 trillion of wealth. Your stash has been picked clean by hordes of algorithmic buzzards on Wall Street. It vanished into thin air from whence it originated. Air unto air.

But you know all this. You read the news…fear, closures, long lines. People panic shop. Shelves, picked over, empty. There’s even a run on condoms. Lamentations and weeping fill the air.

Calm down, it’ll pass. Of course, you might, too, but then again so what? It’s not if but when. Everything passes, even in America. Still, it’s not likely to be as disastrous as the Spanish flu of 1918, not to be confused with the Cuban invasion of the ‘Spanish fly’ which for all its hype did little to arouse the population.

Let’s take a snapshot of the future. Change is coming. Get ready.

Quarantine and rationing will be acceptable lifestyles. Those stigmatized with a scarlet V stenciled to their forehead will be confined to colonies surrounded by concertina wire where loudspeakers blast day and night, “Unclean, unclean.” Others will seek shelter in sanitized enclosures like bubble tent cities.

Don’t worry about pumping gas. American oil fields have gone dry. All vehicles will have solar panels embedded in their roofs. The Saudis and Russia have cornered all fossil fuels and have resorted to taking worthless IOU’s from Europe to pay for the unholy alliance.

The ‘drive-through’ phenomena of the ‘50’s will rule the future. Mechanical arms jutting from germ-proof windows will hand off your Starbucks and burgers. No one will be allowed out of the vehicle for any reason.

Even now our small island is experiencing drive-through mania. Grocery shopping is done by phone and delivered to your vehicle outside. Those brave enough to venture inside will find sprinkler systems installed along all aisles that regularly spray sanitized solutions on the merchandise.

Today I visit our local drug store and find it has installed a sprinkler system over the door entrance. It emits a fine mist of Clorox-disinfectant that does a fair job of sanitizing the shopper, but its chemical stench clings for hours. These systems are subsidized by the Sanders Sanitation for All bureaucracy in honor of its progenitor.

Personal hygiene will be paramount. No more touching of any sort in public. Hand shaking is out, bowing is in. Anyone found kissing or showing intimate signs of affection in public must have a notarized document stating mutual consent.

Churches will no longer have convocations of celebrants. They will offer drive-through tents where preachers in HAZMAT suits offer communion and absolution in a sterile atmosphere. Repentance will still be a private matter.

A big shocker will be the obliteration of cash. It happened so fast that the drug cartels had to forfeit their coffers of cash and go legit. The tradeoff was receiving the lucrative franchise from Medicare to operate clinics for the addicted.

For everyday folks, no cash, no problem. Swiping is more convenient. Besides, cash is filthy. With inflation it’s worthless. It’s been replaced by the free, no-limit Universal Credit Card for All in honor of tribal senator Warren’s tireless efforts to accomplish equality for all. It’s being funded by the Fed which repudiated all outstanding debt and confiscated all the stock from Fortune 500 companies.

Perhaps the most positive progress occurring in the post-panic years of financial reset is the Stock for All concept credited to Princess AOC. It is funded by a hostile takeover of assets of all billionaires in exchange for the State of California.

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In the meantime, blame no one, just survive the virus and its consequences best you can.

But one thing is for sure: Made in China has a brand-new meaning.

 

Bud Hearn

March 16, 2020